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Mocked by Weevils

Let me take your hand,

Guide me from love’s darkness,

I no longer desire to live this tortuous life,

every day, I contemplate my ending

As the reasonable action

of a reasonable man,

In my mind, it is the only way forward.

As you know, I am too much of a coward,

I need your help

Each day my skin crawls,

Imaginary long-snouted Weevils infect me

Their tiny footprints remain

On my dry, flaking skin,

Each one of their footprints points forward

Mocking any decision I’ve made,

to crawl backwards,

They lick my very soul with their long tongues,

Rasping each cell, moistening hair follicles flat

Against my skin.

Once again, Weevils mock,

A flattened metaphor

No longer standing rigid against the breeze.

But crashed out without spinal strength

These thoughts of uselessness are not my own,

They are her emotional transferences,

I’m unable to escape her mockery

Unable to escape her weevils

Even in my mind,

I’m unable to run,

She said I was worthless

She said I was incapable

Of succeeding in life without her,

She knew the reality.

Her clutches were tight,

my guilt is intense,

Any hope is lost.

Then you came

showing me compassion,

Showing a desire

to comfort me,

Showing me a way forward

When no one else would or could,

You established an intervention,

Your daughters knew how to relate,

At this last late hour,

there is finally no more pain

I’d like to thank you. Nyx

Now I’m accompanied by my Weevil friends

But only as fodder

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