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How am I Feeling?

I really don’t know that I can get myself through this,

My will ebbs like blood from a slit wrist,

All the time I’m thinking and pondering

Can I go on like this? I’m wondering.

It’s not that I don’t care or want normality so,

Shame causes my head to drop to the floor so low.

That I can’t see ahead to where I’m going,

I know where I’ve been, but now I’m just toing and froing

I’m not quite aware of all the implications

Not sure what happens next, or any ramifications.

I suppose it’s because I’m no longer in control of me

My life is being sorted by others, officially,

So I don’t know whether I can survive this pain,

Like a barren desert, my future before me lain

My overriding thought and wish

Is that someday I’ll get myself through this.

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